Observations. (A Whole30 post)

I already posted today, but as I sit down tonight, at the end of a very long day, I realize a couple things I need to document for myself.

1. Not so hard in the big picture. This last week has not been near the struggle I thought it would be. Yes, at moments it has been so hard I thought about throwing myself in front of a bus. But 1. there are no buses in this town, and 2. they were only moments. Fleeting moments. When I look at the whole, most of it has not been near as hard as I expected.

2. Discipline. I cannot believe the amount of discipline I feel in my bones at this moment. It is exhilarating. And it's gone beyond food. I have not bit my nails all week. (This is huge!) I have been more diligent about scheduled bed time, prayer with kids, and reading with/to them. My temper has been more controlled and my attitude is improving (though at moments I'm a raving lunatic. I blame this on sugar withdrawal. Poor kids.) Even improved massively on a couple other behavorial bad habits that I have struggled with breaking for years.

3. Satiation. I... am... FULL! I ate three meals today, relatively small, and with each, I did not feel the need to have seconds! WHAT?!  I had a handful of almonds and felt full. Dinner was so good that I considered having another helping, but then I just pushed my bowl away and went on, and even forgot that I considered it. How empowered this girl feels! I have NEVER been able to do that, and I cannot remember the last day I felt full. 

4. Aches and pains. My back is killing me. I feel kind of weak. I want to exercise, and will start small tomorrow. But my back, and my weakness. My mind feels clear and energetic, but my back is in poor condition. I attribute this to 1. sitting at the computer too much (so I'm getting off and staying off tomorrow. Been on extra the last few days working on a talk, handout, and slide show for a talk I'm presenting this weekend for a retreat in February), and 2. not eating enough. Whenever I'm not eating enough, my back usually is the first to feel it. It is certainly not intentional, but, see number three, I am full! Going to be more mindful of being active, staying away from the computer now that the talk and such are (mostly) done, and eating. Never, ever thought I'd say that.

5. Attitude is everything. And mine has improved, like, whoa, compared to last month. It is bizarre. My poor family. Bi-polar MUCH?! At least at this point it's just an occasional snap because I haven't had a drop of sugar in a week. :)

How is this possible? Mind over matter? Mind over food. Who knew that changing my eating habits would change so many other things? If I feel this at only day 7, I am curious and excited about the next few weeks. I cannot imagine these results are typical for day 7, but my mind was long past ready for this change. I hope they continue and I don't crash and burn! If so, I will eat my words (without sugar, of course).


Dinner tonight: Threw some cut up chicken into a pot with crushed tomatoes and coconut milk. Added some sea salt, onion, fresh minced garlic, green onion, chopped up some weird squash I bought last week (green, bottom looks like a belly button, shaped like a pear), and some minced jalapeno. Let it simmer, and it was delicious! Spicy, but in a perfect way. Score. Getting creative here, and it's good. Having fun in the kitchen without getting fat is always good.